Learning as an Adult

Over the past few months, I’ve made learning a real priority in my life. In February and March, I took a French lesson every single day for 60 days straight. I also tried (read: overpaid for) a two-day pottery workshop. Starting in April, I began swimming lessons. In May, I started a Pilates Teacher Training course.

Learning is always worth the effort (easy to say retrospectively) but in the moment, it usually sucks. It’s a painful process. Ever heard someone say “you need to enjoy the process and not just fall in love with the outcome”? I bet that person never tried learning how to swim at 26 years old.

The embarrassment felt during a particularly difficult French lesson is low on the spectrum. Mainly because you don’t give a crap if you mess up your conjugation in front of a bunch of strangers you’ll never see again. It’s flustering in the moment, when all you want is to answer the teacher’s question and have them move on to the next person, but your heartbeat usually settles within the minute. Nothing to lose sleep over. Takeaway: You need to make mistakes to learn. Also, daily practice is key.

The embarrassment of adult swimming lessons is on another level. Ever had swimming lessons in a kiddie pool right next to a group of 20+ triathletes? Well, I have and it’s a humbling experience to say the least. For this experience, I know the embarrassment is in my head. None of the adults are even looking at me, and if they are, they’re quite supportive and encouraging of my endeavor. My teenage swim coach is an adorable German girl who squealed with delight when I took my first strokes. I know that learning to swim is nothing to be embarrassed about (and is actually quite commendable) but there’s nothing like using two pool noodles and having a floaty strapped to your back to keep your ego in check. Takeaway: The spotlight effect can be paralyzing. Don’t let it be. Also, “everything you've ever wanted is sitting on the other side of fear.

Another thing that definitely kept my ego in check was my first time throwing on a pottery wheel. When you watch videos of people doing this on Instagram or Youtube, it looks so easy. Women are wearing full white outfits while casually shaping a piece of clay into a vase or bowl. I went into this experience truly thinking that I was going to bring home a few plates, bowls, and maybe a cup. I walked away with two misshapen dishes and a mini pitcher. The workshop was a nice bonding activity with friends, a good opportunity to try something that’s been on my bucket list for a while, but maybe not the best hobby for me to pursue in the long term. Takeaway: You never know if you like something until you try it!

I’m not really “embarrassed” during my Pilates teacher training. It’s the same kind of feeling you have before you have to make a presentation in front of the class, or give a presentation to the CEO of the company you work for. Your heart is a bit in your throat, but once you get in the groove, you feel comfortable. It’s the same for teaching a class. Of course you hope that the students enjoy the class you’ve planned for them and that you remember the sequence of moves, but it’s not “embarrassing".” It’s more stressful. I could feel different when I start teaching live classes but I really could not give a rat’s ass about what my fellow students in the trainings think of me. I’m not sure if this is misplaced ego, the fact that I’m not friends with any of them, or even that becoming a Pilates teacher is just something I’m doing for fun and not my main source of income but I’m quite chill during this learning process. I know that I’m not the best teacher of the group, but I know if I keep practicing that it will come and that’s enough for me at the moment. Would I love to become a great Pilates teacher? Definitely. Is it the end of the world if I don’t get hired by the studio in July? Nope. I’ll just keep practicing. Takeaway: You’re never going to be good at something unless you start.

I want to keep learning my whole life - whether that’s a new language, a new hobby, or sport. I know that learning is necessary for me to build confidence in myself, especially when it’s something that doesn’t come easily to me. These past few months have been a great learning period for me, not only in learning new material, but finding out what kind of learning I like to do. I much prefer to do something (with my hands, body, to perform the action) than to study or read about something. When I start working again, I don’t want to stop learning, even though I know it will look different than how it has the last few months. I will most likely have to focus more on one or two things at a time and make time for a daily practice of 15-30 minutes on the things I’d like to pursue. Instead of musing about "what should I focus on, pursue, etc." I should have more of a bias towards action. This means picking 1-2 things that I'd like to practice (I'm feeling like French and pilates are going to be the main two things) and prioritizing that practice every day to keep the learning going. There's no reason why learning should take a back seat to a job or be conflated with personal development.